Jul 30 2008
Now I know why it’s blank!
Washington Department of Ecology, you are my heros!
They have finally described the mystery of the century!
You’ve seen it for years. It’s tormented you, hounded you. You’ve had the nightmares just like the rest of us. Everytime you open a book, or pamphlet or- most appropriately- a government document, you wonder if it will be there. Taunting you. Staring you in the face.
Laughing at you.
That’s right, I’m talking about that ever so confusing statement
This page intentionally left blank
It’s always there! There’s even an intentionally blank website! Blank pages everywhere, and they’re never explained! No-one you ever ask will tell you the purpose of the blank page. Either they don’t know, and they get exited and frustrated about it…
…or, they get mysteriously quiet, look down at their watch, attempt half-heartedly to change the subject, and then suddenly remember an incredibly important meeting that they half to run off to.
Washington: The least secretive of all the states
Those are government officials protecting their heinous secrets!
But, Washington State, striving to complete their “2008 public service improvement goal” by becoming the least secretive of all the states- has done the unthinkable!
Oh sure, you may think that the real purpose of the document is to present A Survey of Zinc Concentrations in Industrial Stormwater Runoff. it certainly looks realistic because there are so many people concerned about their roofing material and its affect on water quality.
But that’s just a diversion!
Washington is smart enough to know that hiding the secret in such an incredibly popular document is the fastest way to distribute it to the widest possible audience! And right under the nose of the federal government!
And it’s there! The secret is right there on page 4, in black and white! Actually, it’s in some unidentified shade of non-offensive light blue and white. But it’s there!
Printing documents without blank pages would result in world-wide catastrophe
I can sleep tonight knowing that there is a reason for the mysterious blank page, and the reason is good. Who knows what untold hardships would occur if that blank page wasn’t there? Printing documents without those blank pages would probably have resulted in a major world-wide catastrophe! We’re talking dogs and cats living together, people!
Once again, the writers of government documents are only trying to protect me. And once again, Washington State, the least secretive of all the states, is there to ease my worry.
